The FML Files: How To Turn Sexy Fun into Misfortune

The FML Files Beach Edition

We all know that I like to have a good time. I believe in carpeing the heck out of my diem. I’m sure you know that you only live once (well unless you’re a follower of Ghandi or you’re buddhist).  That’s why I try to make sure I get the most out of my experiences and have fun no matter what I’m doing.  And why I usually have a smile on my face.

But along with my effort to squeeze every last bit of excitement out of every situation, I sometimes forget to err on the side of caution.

And that’s when disaster strikes. I’m just one of those people that things happen to. Of course, I don’t learn from my mistakes. In fact, it’s like I invite trouble where none is to be found.

Here’s a great example.

The hubby and I were just in Aruba for the most amazing blogger trip courtesy of The Boardwalk Small Hotel Aruba (you’ll see more about our travels on BrazenWoman, but in the meantime, feel free to stalk my personal Instagram and Brazenwomandotcom too for selected pics.  We spent five days exploring this most incredible island (size obviously does not matter). One of the cool things about Aruba is that there are tons of little hidden beaches. We took our car one day and just drove around looking for them. Since we have our GPS has made us dumb, we got lost (well, as lost as you can get on an island that’s 20 miles long and 7 miles wide…) and ended up at this stunning place.

Secret Hidden Beach in Aruba

It was completely deserted. There was NOBODY there. Not even a sea turtle.


White sand, blue ocean, pure isolation.

I ripped off my sundress (don’t get too excited. I was wearing a bathing suit), and jumped into the ocean. With a suggestive look I offered the opportunity of his lifetime: that we recreate this famous scene from Here to Eternity. You know the one. Where they roll around lustfully in the surf.

What can I say? You gotta keep it spicy after 21 years of marriage.

The hubs was reticent. He’s not big on sand in all the places.

So I thought I would entice him with a bit of a show. A come hither show. Very pinup girl.


Secret Beach in ArubaIMG_0953



So sexy, right? He couldn’t resist jumping in. Especially after I almost lost my bathing suit top from all the vigorous sand rolling. Do you know where I’m going with this?


Fact: if you roll around in the surf you can stir up nests of sand flies. It’s true. This is FML, island style. Good ideas gone wrong.

The upside? At least I kept it classy and my bathing suit on.

Luckily they sell Benadryl in Aruba. This guy went out to get me some.



(Pre-swarm selfie).

Did you know that nearby hidden beaches they have seaside restaurants with beer? Great for warming up after a nice sandy swim.

Drinking beer at Zee Rover in Aruba

Got a great vacation story to share? I’d love to hear it.




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