Author’s Note: that this is a #laterpost. It’s been almost a week since this happened to me. I was a bit traumatized, and it took me a while to get over the experience.
Let me ask you this: can you live without your desktop email client? Is it the Anastasia to your Christian, the Bella to your Edward?
Could you live without it, even for a day?
No? Then you’ll cringe, cry, wail and rejoice at this story I’m about to tell you. Because I can’t, and I almost had to. Like forever.
Another question: Do you know what POP is? How about IMAP?
I do. Now.
Last Wednesday morning started as any other mundane day in the life of Chicky. I pretended I was asleep so I didn’t have to get up and make my son’s lunch. At 7:15 am, I checked email, Instagram and Twitter. I then hid under the duvet and watched videos on Facebook until the son and husband left for school & work respectively. I left the house at 9:15 and headed to my check-up appointment at the doctor (gotta screen for the silent killers regularly, you know.)
When I arrived at the doc, I noticed that my emails hadn’t updated on my iphone since 8:56 am. That was weird, but had happened before. I closed my email app. I opened the email app. Nope. I turned my phone on and off. Nope.
I gave up and gave myself over the horrors of an annual physical (bend over, please….)
Fast forward and I arrived home, ready to hunker down to work.
No emails on my macmail either. Did nobody love me anymore? I flipped over to Yahoo Webmail and there were lots of emails. Except Yahoo webmail is horrible and not user friendly at all. So I freaked out.
Wouldn’t you? I do NOT like webmail.
I called Rogers tech support, reached business services somehow, and was calmly told that they’d look into a solution and get back to me in 24-48 HOURS.
Panic set in. Because I hate webmail. Did I mention that?
But then the nice man called back in 10 minutes and said that they’d reset my email and my password and it should all be working. My iphone was. My computer email was not.
Time check: 2 pm. Actual work done: none.
So he told me to delete my email account off my macmail and start over.
That was a bad idea.
My inbox began to load 26,000 UNREAD MESSAGES (don’t lecture me. That figure includes sent as well. Plus, I kinda hoard emails. You know, in case I’ll need them), and then STOPPED at February 2, 2014. And would not start again. Of course, this was after I’d hung up with tech support, whose parting words were, there is nothing else we can do. Maybe it’s your macmail.
Rogers Tech Support told me to call APPLE.
Time check: 4 pm. Actual work done: none.
So then I thought, What Would Bill Gates Do Meaning What Would Steve Jobs NOT Do (WWBGDMWWSJTD) ?
I googled it. And found it was a known issue. There was talk of adding temp email boxes and things magically working again, and all kinds of tech speak like that. I began to cry. I tweeted @rogershelps. That always makes me feel better, you know. To publicize my problems. Makes them more real.
And then I went into webmail, deleted a ton of old messages and then DELETeD MY MACMAIL INBOX AGAIN. And re-added it.
The same thing happened, except this time, we made it all the way till February 6th.
I gave up.
I did what I could off my iphone, but didn’t really answer any actual emails because I HATE webmail.
Time check: 6 pm Actual work done: very little
The next day I logged onto a support chat with Apple and lied and said I’d just purchased the software because there was no way I was paying $35. After my problem was escalated because you know, if it’s mine, it’s going to be unfixable by normal measures, the senior adviser followed the WWBGDMWWSJTD rule.
He googled it. He found I was not alone. I had what’s called a ‘known issue unrelated to Apple software’.
Apple Tech Support told me to call YAHOO.
Before he passed me off into the 7th circle, he asked me this important question: Why is your email set to POP? That’s not good.
Remember that question.
User tip: You can’t call Yahoo.
I navigated the rabbit warren of Yahoo’s Help section to encounter this message: Your service provider is Rogers. Contact Rogers for all email issues.
Yahoo Support told me to call ROGERS.
Are you sensing a trend here?
I should point out that throughout this whole process, @rogershelps continued to tweet me with kind and helpful messages like How are you doing? and Is your problem resolved? I never felt alone, even in the depths of my despair. It was due to that deepening relationship that I felt free to tweet them back: Yahoo says the buck stops with you.
And you know what? It did. Within two hours my email was up and running again. Thanks to the help of the Shan from the social media team and some super sleuthing by Adam from the Rogers TechXperts.
Remember that whole POP vs IMAP thing? Rogers likes POP for some technical reason like security and stuff and well…macmail does not.
Not at all.
This is a long story, isn’t it? Imagine how it felt to me. I want you to feel my two days of pain.
Here’s the technical mumbo jumbo:
When I deleted my email (which Apple tech guy said was the dumbest thing I could have done) in an effort to rectify a known issue that was rectifying itself if I’d only been patient, and re-added it, I changed from my old settings of IMAP (which worked) to POP (the new Rogers automatic settings which didn’t). Smart guy Adam figured this all out after I casually mentioned the important question from the Apple guy (remember I told you to remember that?).
Take a breath. Stop rolling your eyes. It was a big deal! Adam said so. We’re best friends now.
And if you’re waiting for an email from me, please be patient. I’m still weeding through the ones I didn’t answer during those two days.
Did I mention I hate webmail?
In summary, FML. Your email is definitely better than mine. And also, I’m really still not sure what POP and IMAP are, if I’m being honest with you.
PS Rogers TechXperts is stellar. If you’re not computer or tech savvy you should check it out. Definitely worth the $14 and change a month for your own tech support team, on call. Not sure if they have pocket protectors, but they do have the solution to your problems. But please, make sure to check if your equipment is plugged in before you call.
Note: This post is NOT sponsored. Seriously? I can’t believe you’d even THINK that I would go through a circus like this just to be able to write an authentic story. This scheiss is real. Like really real. Totally happened.